By Nico Strydom

The number of domestic violence incidents in South Africa increased during the Covid-19 lockdown.

This is aggravated by the fact that so many women who are victims of abuse and who choose to talk about it are blamed and humiliated and made to feel that there is nothing remarkable about their experience.

“You must have done something to make him treat you like this. Don’t wash your dirty laundry in public. You have to make it work. All of us have problems, yours are nothing special.”

These are words that are heard so often by women who are victims of gender-based violence, and especially domestic violence, says Pertunia Bopape, an occupational therapist with Netcare Akeso, Nelspruit.

“Due to the fear felt by abused women, especially when it comes to violence in an intimate relationship, we suspect that there are a considerable number of unreported cases. Many of these women have been terrorised by their partners to such an extent that they are too scared to tell anybody what is happening to them.”

Economic factors also play a big role, with many women who are dependent on their partners and therefore cannot afford to leave. If there are children involved the situation can feel even more hopeless to the victims.

“A woman’s choice to stay in a relationship where she is abused can often be reinforced by the feedback she gets from others. It can vary from fear for condemnation for a failed relationship and a perceived loss of status or to feeling pressurised by the stereotype that women are the rock of the household, that they have to take the pain and suffer in silence.”

Bopape points out that there is a common misconception that abuse is always physical. “It includes any form of abuse that causes damage and affects the safety and wellbeing of a woman physically, emotionally or in other ways. It can also include conduct such as stalking and damage to property.”

Women are often hurt physically on the parts of their body that are covered by clothes. This type of abuse is usually accompanied by emotional abuse, including threats, isolation from family and friends, power control and eavesdropping on conversations.

It is important for abused women to start by telling somebody, whether it’s a person they trust or one of the organisations that support women who are victims of violence. “It is recommended that women who are victims of physical or sexual abuse have a J88 form completed by a medical doctor or registered nurse. It is a formal record of the injuries sustained in an incident of physical or sexual violence and can be of help should the victim lay a charge.

“It is very important for victims to note that the J88 form is not a charge in itself, it is only a legal record of what happened and you don’t have to be afraid that an assessment is done here. It can really help you if someday you decide to lay charges against your abuser, even if you feel that you cannot do it now.”

There are many facilities that are waiting to assist victims of gender-based or domestic violence. The Department of Social Development has set up a 24-hour control centre against gender-based violence. The centre can be contacted on 0800 428 428, or a Please Call Me can be sent by dialling *120*7867# from your cell phone. The control centre provides trauma counselling and assistance and can also put victims in contact with the police or a social worker

Other bodies that can be contacted:

LifeLine 086 132 2322

Women Abuse Helpline 0800 150 150

Stop Misdaad 08600 10111

Childline 0800 055 555

Sources

Netcare Akeso: https://www.akeso.co.za/

Global Citizen: https://www.globalcitizen.org/en/content/what-to-do-experience-gender-violence-south-africa/

Life Healthcare: https://www.lifehealthcare.co.za/news-and-info-hub/latest-news/support-for-victims-of-gender-based-violence-gbv/