By Marli Naidoo When a couple with children from their previous marriages decide to get married, it can be a huge adjustment for everyone. Both gain a new marriage partner, plus a number of children. The children have stepsisters and -brothers whom they must learn to understand, and a new...
By Melodie Veldhuizen The way in which we talk to our children has an effect on how they see themselves and the world. Sometimes we say things that leave life-long scars. Think twice before saying to your child: Hurry up We can’t afford it Don’t’ talk to strangers Be careful Eat all your food, otherwise you may not … Let me do it for you Don’t do it like that You are naughty Stop crying/Stop acting like a baby It’s not that serious Everything will be okay Must I give you something to cry about? Calm yourself When I was ... Lees meer.
By Melodie Veldhuizen There will come a time when your child attends a Boy or Girl Scout, choir, survival or church camp or whatever camp, for the first time. For you and your child it may be a scary prospect, fraught with many uncertainties. With the correct attitude and preparation you will survive it and it can be a positive and enriching experience for everyone. How to get ready and prepare your child The packing and purchasing of new camping gear form an important part of the excursion. It could help to get your child excited. Take him along when ... Lees meer.
By Melodie Veldhuizen Autism spectrum disorderc(ASD) is a developmental disorder that affects the way in which children (and adults) who suffer from it interact and communicate with other people. They usually have problems relating to other people and making eye contact and often withdraw into a world of their own. It can be heartbreaking and even frustrating to parents, grandparents and other members of the family and friends as well as to caregivers if they cannot connect with this child, but it is possible to breach the barriers. Autism cannot be cured, but many of these children can be taught ... Lees meer.
By Marli Naidoo So, your older friends’ warnings were not unfounded. All of a sudden your child begins to roll his eyes when you give him an instruction, or unabashedly back-chats, slams doors and shouts at you ─ clear signs that your child has officially entered his teens. It’s difficult to believe that this is normal behaviour. During adolescence your child begins to move away from you and to individualise. He is busy discovering his individuality and can at times be rude about it. Children find it difficult to verbalise this process and it is then easier to react rudely ... Lees meer.
By Marli Naidoo While most parents agree that they only want the best for their children, it is quite possible that their definition of “the best” differs, which could then lead to arguments about parenting. Parents commonly have diverse parenting skills and make decisions according to how they themselves were reared. It is quite normal to differ. However, differences that aren’t handled correctly can drive a wedge between parents, which can influence the happiness of the entire family. The focus can easily be shifted to teach your child how to behave and solve his problems after friction between the parents ... Lees meer.
By Anja van den Berg You and your partner have decided to make a life together and form a new, blended family that includes children from one or both of your previous relationships. Congratulations! What lies ahead can be a rewarding as well as a challenging experience. It can take a long time for a blended family to begin to feel comfortable and function well together. While you as parents are likely to approach remarriage and a new blended family with great joy and expectation, your kids or your new spouse’s kids may not be nearly as excited. They will ... Lees meer.
By Anja van den Berg The demands of both work and parenting are rising. According to the World Bank, women now constitute 40% to 50% of the workforce in many countries around the world, meaning work outside the home is impacting men and women more equally. The Pew Research Centre has found that dads now see parenting as being just as central to their identities as moms do, and households with kids are now 66% dual-income, versus 49% in 1970. It is no surprise, given these time commitments, that 50% to 60% of parents find work-life balance difficult. Research pair ... Lees meer.
By Marli Naidoo Perhaps you’re one of those moms who say that their children come before their husbands on the priority list because they did not ask to be here, cannot fend for themselves, and the husband is old enough to take care of himself. However, is this attitude the best for your children and your marriage? It has been found that conjugal bliss dims after the birth of children. This decline is 42% higher in our generation than in the previous one. This happiness and satisfaction decline even more with the birth of every subsequent child. This does not ... Lees meer.
By Karen van der Berg If there is one thing women want the most, it is for their husbands to talk about their emotions. Most men struggle to talk about their emotions or “deeper” stuff such as relationships. The good news is, you can teach your husband to do so. This is according to Raymond Fourie, a marriage counsellor in Bellville. Most people possess an amazing ability to grow and change. Your husband does not find it as easy as you do to talk about matters of the heart, because as a child he received messages to suppress his experiences ... Lees meer.
By Anja van den Berg Divorce is not something to be taken lightly. The emotional and financial fallout from ending a marriage can be tremendous and traumatic for all involved. “The common conclusion to all studies on prevention of relationship breakdown and the causes of divorce is that a constellation of factors, not a single cause, is normally responsible for the breakdown of a marriage relationship,” says Bertus Preller, family law and divorce lawyer at Bertus Preller & Associates Inc. in Cape Town. Since relationships are dynamic and family circumstances alter throughout the course of the marriage (for example, the ... Lees meer.
Chisanga Mukuka Just like the rest of us, your furry friend is also prone to germs, bacteria and bouts of sickness. And in the same way that you might catch a cold from other people, conditions from pets can sometimes be passed on to their owners. The good news is that most zoonotic diseases (diseases that can be transferred from animals to humans) are quite rare, and those that you could contract are treatable and can be prevented through simple measures. A great start is knowing which infections are most likely to cross over. Familiarise yourself with the following conditions: ... Lees meer.
Marli Naidoo In many cases the loss of a pet is a child’s first introduction to death. It can therefore leave him sad, but can also fill him with feelings of guilt, fear and confusion. Some children may even resent a friend whose pet is still alive. It therefore is our duty to help our children through this difficult time. A toddler will probably not yet understand the concept of death. Explain to him that his pet is dead and won’t return, but that it definitely is not his fault. Four- to six-year-olds are inclined to see death as a ... Lees meer.
We all love our pets but it’s not always easy to live the communal life with an animal, especially a dog. If you’re planning on moving to a complex and have a dog, or live in one and want to get a dog, there are some things you need to consider. Firstly, is the complex pet-friendly? Some people move to a complex because they don’t want neighbours with pets, so make sure you can have a dog before you move in or buy one. Secondly, do you have the right kind of dog for complex living? Remember that an animal ... Lees meer.
Bryan Brook We all love our pets but it’s not always easy to live the communal life with an animal, especially a dog. If you’re planning to move to a complex and have a dog, or if you live in one and want to get a dog, there are some things you need to consider. Firstly, make sure the complex is pet-friendly. Some people move to a complex because they don’t want neighbours with pets, so make sure you can have a dog before you move in or buy one. Secondly, make sure that you have the right kind of ... Lees meer.
Anja van den Berg Adopting a dog is like choosing a brand new family member. It’s not a decision to be taken lightly and proper research should be done for any new pet. When there are kids involved, the decision is even more important. Getting a dog for the family involves reading up about breeds, checking the reputation of the breeder and the health of the dog and making sure that your kids and living environment are suitable for a particular breed. “The truth is that some breeds are not great for families with children,” says Alexandra Cannon, writing for ... Lees meer.
By Anja van den Berg The recent incident of a seven-year-old girl who was raped in a Dros restaurant restroom in Pretoria has left many South Africans fearing for their children’s safety. The sad reality is this is just one of many incidents – over 40% of all rapes in South Africa are committed against children. In 41% of the more than 120,000 total rape cases reported in the last three financial years, children were the victims, Minister of Police Bheki Cele revealed in Parliament recently. The frightening part is that these statistics have been increasing over the years. Acknowledging ... Lees meer.
By Dr Eugene Brink Holidays should be about fun and some much-needed rest and relaxation, right? Yes, it should, but reality doesn’t always turn out the way you hoped it would. The truth of the matter is that tragedy may well strike while you are busy vacationing. Unwind you must because that is what holidays are for, but one should also be mindful of the hazards that may await you and your family. In South Africa, these are varied: Being robbed Criminals are always on the prowl and even more so during the holidays when people are letting their guard ... Lees meer.
By Melodie Veldhuizen For your own peace of mind and your children’s safety it is essential for you to make them aware of safety and how to handle emergency situations from a young age. The most important rules Emergency numbers, contact details and self-identification Children of all ages must know how to use a telephone and where to get help in an emergency. Let them memorise important numbers. If they can read, display emergency numbers close to the telephone where they can easily find them in an emergency. Load important and emergency numbers on the housephone and on everybody’s cell ... Lees meer.
By Nico Strydom Rape victims are usually too shocked or afraid to act in the moments immediately after the event. However, there are a few steps you can take immediately to ensure your own safety and to help apprehending and prosecuting the rapist as quickly as possible. Make sure you are safe If you have been raped, you should try to get to a safe place as quickly as possible. Immediately tell somebody what has happened Contact somebody as soon as you have reached a safe place. You can contact a family member or friend or go to the nearest ... Lees meer.
By Dr. Eugene Brink Henri van Breda was recently found guilty and sentenced to three life terms in prison for the murder of his father, brother and mother at the De Zalze luxury estate in Stellenbosch in 2015. It was one of the most sensational trials and family murders in the history of South Africa and garnered intense media attention. It seemed completely senseless and unusual for someone from such an esteemed, stable and well-to-do family to murder them in such an abhorrent manner. This perhaps explains why the case drew the amount of attention and scrutiny it did. Their ... Lees meer.
During the preamble to the Christmas season and this busy time do you want to lock yourself inside your home and only appear again after New Year? You hate the crowds of people and large shopping malls and Rudolph the red nosed reindeer and Jingle bells blaring in your ears. Even Father Christmas who sits back quietly and just utters a ho-ho-ho now and then while you rush around for Christmas food and Christmas gifts irritates you. Unfortunately you cannot avoid the festive season, but you can sidestep the Christmas rush. Christmas gifts: Compile your gift list ahead of time. Look ... Lees meer.
Essie Bester For decades people have been hearing that the sun can make you old and even kill you. And yet it would seem that people think that scientists are lying about it and it is all just a lot of scare stories. South Africans are still shockingly careless or ignorant about protection against the sun, says the Durban-based dermatologist, Dr Marc Roscher. Be sun smart this year by familiarising yourself with all the necessary hints and facts. Suntan cream Nothing ages your skin faster than the sun, regardless of suntan cream. And although there are as yet no scientific ... Lees meer.
By Nico Strydom The matric exams have come and gone and matrics are looking ahead with great excitement to the holidays and parties in the offing. Parties and celebrations will be held all over the country. “Unfortunately, each year there are also cases where matrics die in road accidents, due to inebriation or a drug overdose. There are also cases of theft of valuable items and vandalism,” says Charnelle Hattingh, national marketing and communications manager at Fidelity ADT. However, according to Hattingh, there are some easy tips that matrics can follow to stay safe. “Make sure all your valuable items ... Lees meer.
By Nico Strydom The festive season is just around the corner and it is time to create memories with friends and family. Whether you are planning a peaceful and quiet holiday in the bush or a holiday at the beach, or just intend staying at home and exploring your town or city, you have to acquire peace of mind by making sure your vehicle is safe and ready for the journey. “Millions of South African motorists will be on the road during the festive season. Most vehicle problems can be detected early by taking it for an inspection, listening for ... Lees meer.
By Anja van den Berg With the Festive Season upon us, many of us will be spending time with extended family. Whether you're traveling to visit parents or they're coming to stay with you, time spent with family can be filled with blessings – and also lots of stress. Like it or not, extended family and in-laws are part of your life. And never is that fact more accentuated than over the Christmas holidays. How can you keep your home harmonious when your mother-in-law has outstayed her welcome, over-excited children are acting up or your spouse is driving you crazy ... Lees meer.
By Lea Brink I serve my entire meal in a green pepper bowl. You will need: 3 red green peppers 500g lean mince meat 1 teaspoon cumin 1 teaspoon coriander 1 teaspoon dried sage 1 teaspoon dried chilli powder 1 teaspoon “Italian spice” 1 teaspoon garlic powder Salt and pepper to taste ½ chopped onion 2 cups grated yellow cheddar cheese 1 cup boiled rice 2 tablespoons olive oil or coconut oil Preheat the oven to 200°C. Cut the red green peppers lengthwise. Remove the pips and clean the inside. Fry the green peppers with the skin facing down in ... Lees meer.
By Essie Bester Wireless Internet connection (WiFi) is an important commodity in any modern household. However, it can be frustrating if it doesn’t perform as desired. Factors such as crowding on your WiFi network, hardware that is not up to standard, or weak coverage are but a few of the things that can have an influence. Some easy ways in which you can improve your WIFI signal yourself are: Place your router in the right spot to improve efficiency Don’t hide it in a cupboard. For the best signal it has to stand in an open space, away from any ... Lees meer.
By Lea Brink A speedy supper! None better to be found. This recipe delivers two chicken kebabs with four chicken squares each. You will need: 8 strips of bacon ¼ onion 2 cloves of garlic 10 chopped mushrooms 1 cup red cabbage 2 cups baby spinach ½ cup goat’s milk cheese (Chevin) ½ cup mozzarella cheese 1 teaspoon nutmeg ½ cup chopped salted almonds Preheat the oven to 180°C. Wrap the bacon around the chicken pieces, four strips per kebab. Place the chicken kebabs in an oven dish and cover with tinfoil. Bake in the oven for approximately 15 minutes. ... Lees meer.
By Lea Brink What is more delicious than lemon tart? Lemon cheesecake, of course. You will need: Crust: 1 ½ packets crumbled Tennis biscuits 2 tablespoons melted butter Filling: 1 litre plain, full cream yoghurt ¼ cup lemon juice Grated rind of 1 lemon 1 tin condensed milk 4 egg-whites Grease a tart tin with butter. Mix the Tennis biscuit crumbs with the melted butter and press into the tart tin to make a crust. Place in the fridge for one hour to cool. Mix the yoghurt, lemon juice, grated lemon rind and condensed milk in a mixing bowl. Pour ... Lees meer.
By Lea Brink Home-made always tastes better. I serve this naan bread with salads. You will need: 2 teaspoons yeast 1 teaspoon sugar ½ cup chopped green olives ½ cup chopped basil ½ cup warm water ½ cup full cream plain yoghurt 3 ½ cups flour ½ cup milk 1 teaspoon salt ½ cup olive oil Add the water, milk, yeast and sugar to a glass bowl. Stir in the yeast mixture gently for everything to dissolve. Place aside for 10 minutes so that the yeast can start making bubbles. Add the flour, olives and basil. Cover your hands with ... Lees meer.