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Families move in together to save money: Make it work


By Marli Naidoo The Covid-19 lockdown as well as South Africa’s general financial situation has put many people under tremendous financial pressure. A solution that is becoming more popular is for families to share homes. Many families, for instance, move in with grandparents and in so doing relieve the pressure...

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Prevent violence against women and children

By Marli Naidoo Violence against women and children occurs in South Africa in shocking numbers. According to President Cyril Ramaphosa, at the moment Covid-19 and violence against women and children are the two pandemics which we are fighting. With the lowering of the lockdown from stage 4 to stage 3, this kind of violence and abuse has increased rapidly, and 21 women and children have been murdered in South Africa during the last few weeks. It is difficult to foresee numbers, as it is not always clear if the crimes were committed against the victims because they are women. However, ... Lees meer.

At wits’ end with your whining child?

By Melodie Veldhuizen Does your toddler’s whining sometimes drive you crazy? The irritating speaking with a whiny voice makes you so angry that eventually you give in and let her have her way. You think she is probably manipulating you, but is this truly the case? And how does one handle it in a positive way? Why do toddlers whine? Whining is fairly common in children from a young age. Sometimes they do it to get their way or to attract attention. However, often it is because they don’t possess the vocabulary or don’t know how to say they aren’t ... Lees meer.

The effect if the Covid-19 lockdown on the relationship between grandparents and grand-children

By Melodie Veldhuizen Prior to Covid -19 and the accompanying restrictions, many grandchildren and grandparents saw each other at least once per week, or even daily. However, in one fell swoop even those who live just a stone’s throw away from each other are in the same boat as cyber grandparents and grandchildren and the only communication with each other is via Skype, Zoom, FaceTime and WhatsApp. In difficult times a person’s emotions are just as vulnerable, if not more, as the body. Granddads, grandmas and grandchildren suffer and long for each other’s physical presence. Why is personal contact between ... Lees meer.

Advice by a veteran in home schooling to Covid-19 home-schooling families

By Marli Naidoo Covid-19 and the lockdown have cast everybody adrift in their own little boat on stormy seas and every parent (willingly or not) has emerged as a home schooler. In spite of the wonderful time of togetherness for families, instructing your own children academically is not always an easy task. Fortunately there are parents who have been schooling their children at home for years who have plenty advice. Do not try to create a duplicate school at your home. Many parents work from home fulltime or are still working away from home and there are simply not enough ... Lees meer.

Helping kids deal with disappointment

By Dr Eugene Brink Not unlike adults, kids will face all manner of disappointments in their young lives. Losing races, being snubbed by friends and not being included in sport teams leave many children crestfallen and despondent. Although some of it will inevitably hurt them, there are mechanisms at your disposal as a parent to help them cope. And like most adversity, it can also be used for good to aid their development. “With proper support and frequent discussions about coping with disappointment and overcoming obstacles, young children can learn how to handle life’s disappointments, big and small,” says Katie ... Lees meer.


Research Shows That Relationships Suffer When Kids Come Along

By Anja van den Berg For around 30 years, researchers have studied how having children affects a marriage, and the results are conclusive: the relationship between spouses suffers once kids come along. Comparing couples with and without children, researchers found that the rate of the decline in relationship satisfaction is nearly twice as steep for couples who have children than for childless couples. If a pregnancy is unplanned, the parents experience even more significant negative impacts on their relationship. This decrease in marital satisfaction likely leads to a change in general happiness, says Professor Matthew Johnson, Director of the Marriage ... Lees meer.

Why you shouldn’t try to keep up with the Joneses

By Melodie Veldhuizen Everyone knows the saying: “Keeping up with the Joneses’". Let’s just call them ‘our neighbours’. They aren’t such bad people and don’t even know how they are influencing your life, but in your opinion on a professional, personal, academic, family or social level and the display of wealth they are better than you and your family. You long to be like them – just as educated or rich, or to move in elite social circles. There are many reasons why you should rather not try to keep up with them. Some of the negative consequences are: You ... Lees meer.

Who pays when you go out?

By Marli Naidoo In the good old days it was very simple. Traditionally the man always paid, no matter who ate what, who chose the restaurant or who arranged the outing. With time, however, this tradition was replaced by personal preference and flexibility. This flexibility can cause a lot of tension when a couple, on their first evening out, have totally different ideas about who is supposed to pay the account. Fortunately there are guidelines that can help to ease the pressure. On the first outing the man must be prepared to pay. Should the lady offer to pay half, ... Lees meer.

Do I have to tell my spouse everything?

By Marli Naidoo When we’re looking for a life partner we think in terms of a best friend. You want to share your life with a person you can tell everything, who will not judge you but will support you. However, if you feel that you should withhold information from this friend, you will probably realise that you are not really best friends. When you are in a serious relationship or marriage, it usually becomes much more complicated role-play than what you would find in even the best friendship. There is money, intimacy, children, value systems and many other factors ... Lees meer.

The keys to a successful marriage

By Marli Naidoo Fairy tales sketch a picture of everlasting happiness when the lucky couple at last makes it to the altar. Nothing is said about the hard work that comes after the marriage. We easily spend thousands of rand and endure sleepless nights to make this one day turn out perfect, but afterwards we don’t want to do the hard work that it takes to enjoy a lifetime of successful togetherness. Fortunately there are steps that one can take to improve our marriages, no matter how long ago we made our pledges. Communicate unambiguously and regularly. Be honest about ... Lees meer.


Yes, your dog can also grieve

By Melodie Veldhuizen Some animal-behaviour scientists doubt whether dogs can really feel grief when a human parent dies. Experts claim that dogs function on the same intellectual and emotional level as children of four to five years old. They do not understand the finality of death and therefore they expect the deceased person to come back. And yet, from the behaviour of dogs it is clear that they experience loss when a human parent dies. The intensity with which dogs experience loss and the extent to which they grieve, depend a lot on how close the relationship between the deceased person ... Lees meer.

Seven diseases you could pick up from your pet

Chisanga Mukuka Just like the rest of us, your furry friend is also prone to germs, bacteria and bouts of sickness. And in the same way that you might catch a cold from other people, conditions from pets can sometimes be passed on to their owners. The good news is that most zoonotic diseases (diseases that can be transferred from animals to humans) are quite rare, and those that you could contract are treatable and can be prevented through simple measures. A great start is knowing which infections are most likely to cross over. Familiarise yourself with the following conditions: ... Lees meer.

Help your child to process the death of a pet

Marli Naidoo In many cases the loss of a pet is a child’s first introduction to death. It can therefore leave him sad, but can also fill him with feelings of guilt, fear and confusion. Some children may even resent a friend whose pet is still alive. It therefore is our duty to help our children through this difficult time. A toddler will probably not yet understand the concept of death. Explain to him that his pet is dead and won’t return, but that it definitely is not his fault. Four- to six-year-olds are inclined to see death as a ... Lees meer.

Having a dog in a complex

We all love our pets but it’s not always easy to live the communal life with an animal, especially a dog. If you’re planning on moving to a complex and have a dog, or live in one and want to get a dog, there are some things you need to consider. Firstly, is the complex pet-friendly? Some people move to a complex because they don’t want neighbours with pets, so make sure you can have a dog before you move in or buy one. Secondly, do you have the right kind of dog for complex living? Remember that an animal ... Lees meer.

Having a dog in a complex

Bryan Brook We all love our pets but it’s not always easy to live the communal life with an animal, especially a dog. If you’re planning to move to a complex and have a dog, or if you live in one and want to get a dog, there are some things you need to consider. Firstly, make sure the complex is pet-friendly. Some people move to a complex because they don’t want neighbours with pets, so make sure you can have a dog before you move in or buy one. Secondly, make sure that you have the right kind of ... Lees meer.


How to look out for dangerous toys

By Nico Strydom On the surface toys offer a wonderful way to keep children busy and can even be educational, but there are also toys that could be dangerous. Kirstie Haslam of DSC Attorneys, an attorney’s firm that specialises in personal injuries, says dangerous toys are available online and in shops and can harbour hidden dangers that expose children to injuries and even death. “It is therefore crucial to be vigilant when buying toys.” The American non-governmental organisation World Against Toys Causing Harm (W.A.T.C.H.) recently issued its annual list of dangerous toys. According to Haslam, the report lays emphasis on ... Lees meer.

NSRI’s safety tips for the holidays

By Emsie Martin It is that time of the year again and the National Sea Rescue Institute (NSRI) urges the public to adopt a water safety mind-set around coastal and inland waters. For a safe experience at the beach, choose a beach that has lifeguards on duty and swim between their flags. If you do that, you don’t need to worry about rip currents, or suddenly getting out of your depth. Putting an arm in the air and waving for help will get a rapid response from the lifeguards on duty. Unfortunately, people regularly swim where there are no lifeguards on duty. ... Lees meer.

Summer holidays – what could go wrong?

By Emsie Martin We all know holidays have their share of injuries, which is why every mom should be prepared for scrapes, cuts, sunburn and bites or stings, bruises and tears. Fortunately, parents have that special instinct to handle their kids’ accidents or small mishaps. From a purple lump the size of an egg on your child’s forehead to a bleeding wound become part of a parent’s life and no longer upset us greatly. With disinfectant, brightly coloured sticking plasters and lots of hugs and kisses, a mom knows she can handle many small mishaps. The secret is to be ... Lees meer.

4 Ways to Keep Your Home Safe While Away This Holiday Season

By Anja van den Berg For most of us the holidays mean spending more time with family and friends, seeing new places or just relaxing somewhere else. However, for criminals this time signals the opportunity to break into homes. Don't let the anticipation of a well-deserved holiday blind you to the risks of leaving your home unprotected. Taking precautions before you leave will keep your home and belongings secure while you're gone so that you won't come back to the horrible reality of a house robbery. Here are a few suggestions: Inform your security company Make sure your alarm is ... Lees meer.

Warning signs that your young child’s nanny might be abusive

By Anja van den Berg One of the toughest decisions any parent must make, is choosing a suitable caretaker for their child. With so many viral videos out there of nannies abusing infants, it is only healthy for moms and dads to be concerned. Below are some of the warning signs you should look out for: The nanny seems secretive about the daily routine How your child and her caregiver spend their time shouldn't be a secret. When you come home, you're probably eager to hear about your child's day. If your caregiver isn't forthcoming about it, warning signs should ... Lees meer.


Get along with your in-laws during these holidays

By Marli Naidoo Some people get along splendidly with their in-laws, but this is not always the case. For others it sometimes requires a lot of effort to even just be in the same room as their in-laws, However, in these situations it is possible to survive Christmas with your in-laws and even be able to enjoy some moments by applying the following tips: Be willing to be flexible without being controlled by others. This is the season to be thankful and generous, and it will benefit everyone to adopt an attitude of humility. Christmas is not a good time ... Lees meer.

Recipe: Delicious Christmas drink

Lea Brink Refreshing and deliciously cool for our hot Christmas days. You will need: 1½ bottle Chardonnay of your choice 400ml JC le Roux La Fleurette 400ml Appletizer 1 cup finely crushed strawberries ½ cup finely crushed blueberries 2 sprigs finely chopped rosemary 2 cups finely chopped watermelon ½ cup pomegranate seeds Combine all the ingredients. Stir well. Place in the fridge for a few hours before serving. Serve in a large jug or bowl with lots of ice. Stir frequently so that everyone gets some of the fruit.  

NSRI’s safety tips for the holidays

By Emsie Martin It is that time of the year again and the National Sea Rescue Institute (NSRI) urges the public to adopt a water safety mind-set around coastal and inland waters. For a safe experience at the beach, choose a beach that has lifeguards on duty and swim between their flags. If you do that, you don’t need to worry about rip currents, or suddenly getting out of your depth. Putting an arm in the air and waving for help will get a rapid response from the lifeguards on duty. Unfortunately, people regularly swim where there are no lifeguards on duty. ... Lees meer.

Recipe: Baked cinnamon and almond buns

Lea Brink Delicious for Christmas morning. You will need: ½ cup halved almonds ½ warm water 2 teaspoons yeast ¼ cup castor sugar ½ teaspoon salt 120 ml milk ¼ cup butter 2 beaten eggs 4 cups flour ¼ cup cocoa 2 tablespoons cinnamon 1 teaspoon nutmeg ½ cup raisins Topping: 1 beaten egg 2 tablespoons cocoa 1 teaspoon flour 50 ml water Combine the ½ cup water with the yeast. Set aside to rest. Mix the castor sugar and salt in a mixing bowl. Add the rest of the dry ingredients. Add the raisins and almonds to the dry ... Lees meer.

Recipe: Cauliflower crisp bake

Lea Brink What would Christmas be without delicious cauliflower. You will need: ½ head of cauliflower 2 cups yellow cheddar cheese 1 cup white cheddar cheese 250ml sour cream ½ cup milk 1 egg Salt and pepper to taste Top layer: Breadcrumbs ¼ cup melted butter Preheat the oven to 180ºC. Wash the cauliflower and break into small edible florets. Beat the egg and combine with the sour cream, milk, yellow cheddar cheese, salt and pepper. Add the cauliflower to the sour cream cheese sauce and stir well. Pour the cauliflower mixture into an oven dish. Sprinkle the white cheddar ... Lees meer.


Recipe: Chocolate chip cookies

Lea Brink The best cookies under the sun. I always have these cookies in the cookie jar. You will need: 2½ cups flour 1 teaspoon bicarbonate of soda ½ teaspoon salt 120g butter 2 cups brown sugar 2 eggs 1 cup milk chocolate or dark chocolate chips ½ cup white chocolate chips 1 tablespoon finely chopped pecan nuts 1½ teaspoons vanilla essence Preheat the oven to 180ºC. Line a baking plate with baking paper and spray with Spray and Cook. Sift the flour, salt and bicarbonate of soda together in a mixing bowl. Beat the butter and sugar together in ... Lees meer.

Recipe: Chocolate marble banana bread

Lea Brink Everyone enjoys baking banana bread. This one will be your favourite by far. You will need: 4 medium size bananas ¾ cup sugar 2 tablespoons sunflower oil 1 teaspoon vanilla essence 1/3 cup milk 1½ cups flour 1 teaspoon baking soda ¾ teaspoon salt 3 tablespoons cocoa powder 6 tablespoons boiled water Preheat the oven to 180ºC. Grease a bread pan with butter and sprinkle some cake flour over the base to make sure the banana bread will not stick. Mash the bananas with a fork. Add the bananas, sugar, oil, milk and vanilla essence to an electric ... Lees meer.

Recipe: Almond butter oatmeal cookies

Lea Brink A healthy snack for the youngsters. You can adapt the recipe if your child is allergic to peanuts. You will need: 2 cups uncooked oatmeal ½ cup almond butter or peanut butter ½ cup raw honey or golden syrup ½ cup coconut oil ¼ cup cocoa powder ¼ teaspoon vanilla essence Mix all the ingredients and stir well. Place one tablespoon of the batter on a baking plate. Repeat the process until you have approximately 15 cookies on the plate. Place in the freezer for one hour before enjoying. Pack the cookies in a plastic container and store ... Lees meer.

Recipe: Sweet potato bread

Lea Brink Fill your home with the divine aroma of freshly baked bread. You will need: 1½ cups boiled and mashed sweet potatoes 3 tablespoons water ½ cup oil 2 eggs ¼ cup sour cream 1 teaspoon vanilla essence 1¾ cups cake flour 1¼ cups sugar ¼ cup brown sugar 2 teaspoons bicarbonate of soda 1 teaspoon cinnamon ½ cup chopped pecan nuts 1 teaspoon nutmeg Pinch of salt 1 teaspoon cumin 1 teaspoon finely grated ginger Preheat the oven to 180ºC. Grease a bread pan with Spray and Cook. Mix the sweet potatoes, eggs, oil, sour cream and vanilla ... Lees meer.

Recipe: Chocolate and almond Swiss roll

Lea Brink When everybody is working from home, it’s great to be able to treat them to a slice of this chocolate Swiss roll. You will need: ¾ cup cake flour 1/3 cup cocoa 1 teaspoon baking powder ½ teaspoon salt 4 eggs, separated ¾ cup castor 5 tablespoons sour cream ¼ cup melted butter 1 teaspoon vanilla essence Filling: 250ml fresh cream 2 tablespoons castor sugar 1 tin “caramel treat” Top layer: 160 g milk chocolate 80g dark chocolate 120ml fresh cream 1 teaspoon coconut oil 2 cups almond slivers Preheat the oven to 180ºC. Line a baking plate ... Lees meer.


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